Tired

Alright, I need to admit this. It has been holding me back for so long, I still want to be with Eric. I know I can't and the stupid things he has done don't help. When I was with him he made me feel really good, like it was just me there and the rest of the world was gone. Now that I don't have him with me, or know where he is for that matter, I feel so away from myself. I find myself so tired all the time, and I didn't know why at first. Now that I think about it, I started getting more and more tired the day I found out that Eric had run away from his Group Home. I am not really sure why I feel like this, and I could be wrong about why I am feeling so tired, but all I remember is that it started around the time that I found out he left. Am I so emotionally attached to him that I can't even be awake for a full day without thinking of him. I can't help that he is in my heart, and I can't help that I still really love him. So I guess I should just try to get help, but from who? I can't talk to my mom about him because she gets so mad for even bringing him up. I can't talk to my sister because she will just say to let it go, like she did before. the people I really want to talk about this with my mom won't let me talk to. It is like all my pain these days comes back to either my mother or Eric. Now I am no expert but I am sure that is not a good thing. How do I overcome the fear of telling my mother how I truly feel, if every time I get up the courage she says she doesn't want to hear it.

It is the funniest thing really, I can't remember how to forgive him, Eric I mean. How do you forgive someone who said they loved you and then cheated and then left and now won't stay out of your mind? Ha ha ha. Right.

I have got a little quote for you...
All love shifts and changes. I don't know if you can be wholeheartedly in love all the time. Julie Andrews

Ok you see, now if you can't be fully in love, then why does my heart still hurt so much? Why can't I get him out of my head, and mostly, why do I still cry for him, over him, and about him. It's a strange thing this LOVE thing. It hurts you more that it seems to make you feel happy. I mean sure for a while you are all shiney and happy, all of my friends will admit that when I was with Eric I was happy...or at least I think they would. But now I am so gloomy all the time.

Ok so now I want to to do this thing for me. Think back to when you were most happy. I am probably most positive that the time you are now thinking of did not involve a boy at all. Tell me if I am right. ok so now that you are completely thinking of what love can do to you...www.quizilla.com/polls/7566771/love-stinks...go to this link...ha ha take my poll. make my day!